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DETROIT — Punk financial dominatrix Sierra “Piss” Richardson nearly doubled her clientele in three days after pivoting to bullying area punks out of their cigarettes, she announced on social media earlier today.
“I am first and foremost a goddess who deserves to be showered with money by pathetic men who love to do what they’re told, but close behind is my love of h...
Ahhh, “Real Sex”. Remember that show? No? Well, you just weren’t lucky enough to have Comcast randomly gift your household a free weekend of HBO in the summer of 1999 just before you started seventh grade like I was. Don’t worry, though, because there’s no need for you to be jealous, as this show ultimately proved itself to be just a bit too “real” for me. As such, here are t...
WASHINGTON — A recent federal investigation into the theatrical rock group GWAR regarding their mock execution of Donald Trump on stage has been called off by Trump himself after the President learned that GWAR uses slave labor, sources close to the White House report.
“I take threats against my life that I have not personally orchestrated very seriously,” the pres...
BOSTON — Local woman Rachel Burch recently described her boyfriend Daniel Talbott’s sociopathic tendencies to her friends and family as him being a “silly goose,” confirmed sources who were more scared than impressed by his humor.
“I just need someone in my life who makes me laugh, and Dan always commits to the bit, even if it means harming the family dog. What a g...
Hey you. Yeah, you with the Chicago Bulls jersey and the nunchucks doing what looks like a robot dance. And is that the game “Clue” next to you? Hmm. Lemme guess: it was a gift from a guitarist.
Then you must be a Buckethead fan with that oddball combination, even if you’re not wearing his iconic KFC bucket and white mask. Maybe that’s for the best in your case. Dud...