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This Question Can Wreck a Marriage
There are some questions that can help a marriage. There are many thoughts that can improve your relationship. But there is one question that will suck the life right out of a marriage. And it is a question you don't even need to ask another person, in order to do the damage. In fact, another person won't make a difference for this question. It is a question lurking within ...

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Anxiety-Anger Anchor
Do you find yourself and/or your spouse anchored to a problem by anxiety or anger? Guess what? Anger and Anxiety -- they come from the same space! One is the inner, the other is the outer expression of fear/hurt/threat. And wow, can it ever anchor both of you to the problems -- keeping you from moving to solution. Why does the Anxiety-Anger become an anchor? How do you cut ...

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The Marriage Saving ARC
Since my book, Thrive Principles, came out, people have asked me why I shifted my focus from saving marriages to thriving. In reality, there is no shift. My System on saving a marriage is the same path to having a thriving marriage. In fact, my focus from the beginning was on how to have a thriving life in all areas of living -- including in marriage. Which means that there ar...

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"Earning” Love? Not the Goal…
Sometimes, people tell me that as they are trying to save their marriage, they actually feel like they are trying to earn back the love of a spouse. They want to know if that is what it really is -- earning back the love (and even trust). The short answer is NO, that is not the goal. A slightly longer answer is that if you are working to earn back love, you are also working o...

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Swiss Cheese and a Marriage Crisis
It may be an odd preoccupation, but I pour over the scuba accident reports. I like to see how the accidents happened, what led to the accident, and how it might have been prevented. The same approach is taken to studying scuba accidents as is applied to airline accident and medical accidents. And it should be applied to marriage crises. There's a theory of accidents in syste...

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