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Over the past few years, we’ve been hearing the same message again and again—from neuroscience, child development, and real-life parenting experience: what we focus on matters. Our brains are naturally wired to look for problems. It’s how we keep our kids safe and how we try to stay one step ahead. But that same wiring can […]

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When our kids misbehave—and they will—we often get understandably angry. We’re frustrated. Annoyed. Exhausted. And in those moments, our inner dialogue gets loud.  I know mine did. I’ve thought (and sometimes said):  “He is doing this to bother me.” “She always does this to get what she wants.” “Why are they always ignoring me?” “They […]

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“When you learn to attribute positive intent to other people, you possess a powerful skill. It is the skill you need to transform opposition into cooperation.”— Becky Bailey, Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline We all do it—often without even realizing it. We look at our child’s behavior and quietly (or not so quietly) label […]

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We all want to praise our children. We want them to feel confident, capable, and good about who they are. But here’s the part that surprises many parents: not all praise actually builds self-esteem. In fact, research shows that the kind of praise we use most often “Good job!” “You’re the best!” “You’re so sweet!” […]

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Dear Adina, My 5-year-old son has been stealing. I found money that he took from a neighbor’s house, and he also came home from school with money I know did not come from me. When I ask him about it, he denies taking it and says he doesn’t know where it came from. How should […]

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