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Love Mindfulness

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Going on our own Bear Hunt
In the long run, avoidance of unwanted emotions doesn’t work. In the wise words of children's author Michael Rosen, "We can't go over it. We can't go under it. We've got to go through it!" Excerpt from 'We're Going on a Bear Hunt' The amygdala hijack came without warning: a sudden, undesired takeover by stress hormones. I had been sitting in a trustees' training session, feeling...

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Nineteen 'Pointless' Blows
Something different had replaced that old, harsh script: " stupid idiot! "  Ten minutes after parking in the new-to-me, cheaper car park, I was no closer to buying my ticket. I'd considered myself organised for downloading the parking app beforehand. But now I was failing, on repeat, to verify my bank card. Cue an urgent call to my partner at home to look up a password. That did...

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Expectations! How we create our own world - and add extra suffering
It was a battle to compete with the wall of sound, and we were the losers. It wasn't what I'd expected! The lack of response stung. Looking back, I saw that my expectations of the occasion had been unrealistic. In fact, they were the main cause of the hurt I felt. In my mind's eye, the party guests were going to pause their conversations and gather around. As we donned our gui...

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Calm amid the Festive Frenzy: four micro-practices for staying sane
Take a moment to mentally step back. Ask yourself, 'how important would this issue look six months from now? ..A few years on?' I find that in most cases, the answer is 'not important at all'. Sometimes, this flags up what is  important. Often, this is to do with our relationships. It matters how we treat people, including ourselves. By this time of year, hedgehogs, dormice an...

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Can I Feel Safe in an Uncertain World?
The nervous system does not differentiate 'social' threat from bodily threat. We all meet risk in our lives. Even if we do not practice extreme sports or live in a war zone, we still have to negotiate busy roads. Yet, for most of us, times when we are at physical risk are few. More often it is not a physical threat but everyday interactions that seem to present danger. Here, the...

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