<![CDATA[Existential Comics]]>

<![CDATA[Existential Comics]]> Follow Existential Comics, filter it, and define how you want to receive the news (via Email, RSS, Telegram, WhatsApp etc.) https://follow.it/existential-comics Tue, 28 Sep 2021 16:00:02 +0200 <![CDATA[Pride and Prejudice and Logical Positivism]]> https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_4VCJ-NFznXneifqJurszLU

"It is a truth universally acknowledged... "

"...that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want..."

"...of an exact scientific language with a specific formal structure and signs that are governed by the rules of deductive logic."

Description: Carnap gets out of his carriage to attend a ball.

Carnap's friend: "Well Mr. Carnap, do you see any girls you like?"

Carnap: "No, because none of them can give me an exact scientific language with a specific formal structure and signs that are governed by the rules of deductive logic."

Mary Warnock: "But don't you find that even if you create such a language, it will be grossly inadequate to discuss the most important question in life?"

Carnap: "No i do not."
Warnock: "I see. Good day, sir."

Carnap: "Who is that young woman?"
Friend: "Baroness Mary Warnock"
Carnap: "I dislike her even more than the rest."

"Later...Mary Warnock comes in out of the rain to Carnap's Villa"

Carnap: "Oh, it's you again, I don't want to marry you."

Warnock: "I don't want to marry you either. "
Carnap: "Oh. Then what do you want?"

Warnock: "I just came here to tell you that your idea that moral statements are “meaningless” has immensely harmed our ability to discuss the good."

Warnock: " and we as philosophers should be working towards clarifying moral questions, and answering real concrete questions in the world, not making them impossible to answer. "

Warnock: "I think your philosophy is second rate, and bound to fail in the end. Good day."

Carnap: "Hmm, maybe i am in love with her."
Carnap: "Too bad the concept of “love” has no empirical content and is therefore meaningless."

]]> Mon, 27 Sep 2021 09:00:00 +0200 https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_4VCJ-NFznXneifqJurszLU <![CDATA[Stoicicsm City]]> https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_4DrwRjeogEjeGrEXdXG_66

"In Ancient Rome, stoic philosopher Seneca founded a city based on Stoic philosophy, where all would live according to nature, and be happy and virtuous. "

Narration: "It was a paradise on Earth, where all followed the teachings of Stoic virtue."

Seneca: "Can i buy some bread?"
Vendor: "There was a drought, so there is no bread to be had."
Seneca: "That is beyond my control so has no effect on my happiness."

Narration: "But then the warlord Agamemnon came to conquer the Stoic city."

Agamemnon: "I will burn this city to the ground if you don't submit to me!"

Seneca: "That's fine. It doesn't bother us."

Agamemnon: "Wait...what did he say?"
Agamemnon's general: "I think he said it doesn't bother them."
Agamemnon: "Alright...i guess, uh...burn it to the ground then."

Description, the city burns, and Seneca is sitting in the fire.

Seneca: "This is fine."

]]> Mon, 20 Sep 2021 09:00:00 +0200 https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_4DrwRjeogEjeGrEXdXG_66 <![CDATA[Existentialism at the Peephole]]> https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_6fsZ-fbE3r6B-xWH3zZqEA

Description: Sartre is in a hallway looking through the keyhole of a door.
Sartre: "Ohhhh yeah, that's right baby... "

Sartre: "...mmm yeah, take it off..."

Sartre: "Sartre, what the hell are you doing?"
de Beauvoir, suddenly appearing: "Sartre, what the hell are you doing?
Sartre: "Ahh!"

Sartre: "Oh uh...just doing some serious existential philosophy, de Beauvoir."

de Beauvoir: "Really? Because it looked like you were spying into that keyhole."
de Beauvoir: "Sartre, come on, really?"
Sartre: "Yeah...totally..."

de Beauvoir: "So uh...can i try?"
Sartre: "Of course."

de Beauvoir, looking through the keyhole: "Oh yeah....that's some interesting...philosophy."

Description: both are now looking through the keyhole.
Sartre: "Ohhh baby, we are learning something deep about the human condition right now."
de Beauvoir: "This is very philosophical."

]]> Mon, 13 Sep 2021 09:00:00 +0200 https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_6fsZ-fbE3r6B-xWH3zZqEA <![CDATA[Fear and Loathing in French Phenomenology]]> https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_5gR_GR6VNbbt5ZnUTwRGH7

PERSON: "We can't stop here Fourcualt, this is crab country! "

PERSON: "We'll drive until we get to nowhere, Sartre."

PERSON: "Okay that's probably far enough."

PERSON: "Yeah, i don't want to drive all night."

PERSON: "Take this, it'll expand your conception of the self more than any book of philosophy."

PERSON: "Dude, have you ever realized that your mind is like....not itself?"

PERSON: "Eh, it looks pretty normal."

PERSON: "Whoa. Deep. You are right, the Cartisian conception of the mind is wholly inadequate to explain our social reality."

PERSON: "Ah well...nonetheless."

PERSON: "Holy shit foucault, we got so wasted. "

PERSON: "What happened last night? I'm so hungover."

PERSON: "...the next morning"

PERSON: "Oh yeah...i always do that when i'm high. "

PERSON: "I don't know, but it sort of looks like you wrote a four volume geneological account of the history of sexuality. "

]]> Mon, 06 Sep 2021 09:00:00 +0200 https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_5gR_GR6VNbbt5ZnUTwRGH7 <![CDATA[Nietzsche Faces the Modern Age]]> https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_7jIOR7Vo5wM3tuT6pSmY81

Nietzsche: "For ten years i have dwelt in the mountains, and i enjoyed my spirit and solitude, and did not weary of it. "
Nietzsche: "But at last i became weary of my wisdom, like the bee that hath gathered too much honey, and so i decided i must go down, as men say, to whom i shall descend."

Nietzsche: "So uh...yeah, i think that pretty much explains the gap in my employment history..."

Job interviewer: "Okay, but we are looking or someone with experience in Microsoft Excel, so... thanks for coming in."

Nietzsche: "Dang. Modernity sucks. Oh well, i don't need a job, i need followers."

Nietzsche, in the street: "God is dead! And it is we who killed him! Are we not-"

Stranger: "What are you doing?"

Nietzsche: "I'm trying to gather true followers, obviously."

Stranger: "That's not how you get followers these days, you have to go online."

Nietzsche: "I see..."

Nietzsche, posting online: "“That which doesn't kill you makes you stronger”, this will get me followers. "

Description: his post barely has any likes and all the replies are getting many likes.

Reply: Moron, what if u are maimed??? Think before you post idiot.

Reply: delete ur account.

Replay: Wrong! One time my cousin didn't get skilled and he is weak as shit.

Reply: "wow bad misunderstand of the historical materialist dialectic to think individuals can overcome the collective struggle. delete ur account."

Nietzsche: "On second thought perhaps existence was a mistake."

]]> Mon, 30 Aug 2021 09:00:00 +0200 https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_7jIOR7Vo5wM3tuT6pSmY81 <![CDATA[On The Usefulness of Philosophy]]> https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_4hhNVWQkJ_lO4sICfMfkNm

Carnap: "Hey, do you guys ever get the feeling that everything we are doing is totally pointless? "

Wittgenstein: "What do you mean, Carnap, like that life is pointless?"

Carnap: "No Wittgenstein, worse than that: what if...philosophy is pointless!?"

Carnap: "What if all of our arguments are just mental masturbation, and empirical science is the only thing capable of generating real knowledge?"

Wittgenstein: "Don't be stupid, of course philosophy is useful."

Carnap: "How so?"
Wittgenstein: "Without philosophy, how else could we ever determine whether or not we needed philosophy?"

Carnap: "That is true."
Wittgenstein: "Think next time before you say something."

]]> Mon, 23 Aug 2021 09:00:00 +0200 https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_4hhNVWQkJ_lO4sICfMfkNm <![CDATA[Thales and the Olive Presses]]> https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_6tJa_UiOwB6e9WSSr4-0sP

Thales: "I follow a higher cause, the cause of philosophy. I seek knowledge, not riches. "
Greek Business Man: "You only say that because you can't get rich."
Thales: "Not true, i could do it if i wanted."

Business Man: "Prove it."
Thales: "I will!"
Business Man: "Fine!"
Thales: "Fine!"

Thales, later on: "Yes...the olive presses aren't being used now, so I'll buy them all up cheaply..."

Thales: "Yes, you see, now that the harvest is good you all have to pay! I told you i could become rich if i wanted!"

Thales: "When the harvest comes, i will own them all, and i can charge exorbitant prices for their use..."

Thales: "So you see, I've proven that i could earn money i wanted, but i don't want to: i choose the path of true happiness."

Business Man: "You just spent a year of your life doing something you hate just to prove you are smarter than everyone else. That's the philosopher's “good life”?"

Thales: "...yes."

]]> Mon, 16 Aug 2021 09:00:00 +0200 https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_6tJa_UiOwB6e9WSSr4-0sP <![CDATA[Socratic Emergency]]> https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_7yIC3aIkYqcVhGNgNo2_0q

Plato: "Socrates, come quick, there is an emergency! "
Socrates: "What is it? "
Plato: "Something terrible has happened down at the agora."

Plato: "Someone is claiming to know something! "

Socrates: "Noooooooooooooooo!"
Plato: "Noooooooooooooooo!"

Socrates: "We have to do something. To the Socratesmobile!"

Plato: "Socratesmobile? What is that? "

Socrates: "That's just what i call it when i make these four slaveboys carry me around."

Socrates, four slaves carrying him: "Faster! People are being wrong as we speak!"

Plato: "Can i ride Socrates? "

Socrates: "No, wisest men in Athens only, read the sign!"
Description: there is a sign on the site that says "wisest men in Athens only".

Protagoras: "...and that's why I know..."
Description: Socrates interrupts him by punching him, then continues to kick him on the ground.

Plato: "Socrates, what are you doing? I thought you were going to engage him in a dialogue to try to teach him why he was wrong? "

Socrates: "Nah, I tried that for like 40 years, turns out it doesn't work."
Plato: "And punching does?"

Socrates: "No, but it is more satisfying."
Plato: "I know he was wrong, but that seems a bit harsh."

Socrates, narrowing his eyes: "Did you just say that you “know” he was wrong? "
Plato, backing off: "Socrates, no, please, i just meant..."

Description: Socrates is now kicking Plato on the ground.

]]> Mon, 09 Aug 2021 09:00:00 +0200 https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_7yIC3aIkYqcVhGNgNo2_0q <![CDATA[Philosopher's Cookoff]]> https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_5g1Yb9sad59f9M7fKGWt0o

Host: "Welcome back to Philosopher's Cookoff, where philosophers try to create the best dish. Let's get back to the action. "

Host: "Hume seems to struggling with his risotto, I'm not sure if the rice will cook in time."

Host: "Meanwhile Wittgenstein just added, well something to his soup. I didn't see what it was but it came out of a box labeled “beetles”. "

Host: "And the Buddha seems to be not doing much of anything. I can't tell if he's panicked or has reached a higher state of enlightenment. "

Host: "Alright, time is up, let's see what the judges think."

Judge: "Hume, the dish is seasoned well, but your rice is way under cooked. "

Hume: "Yes, i took a risk, the dish takes 40 minutes to cook, i tried to cook it in 20. I was hoping the laws of physics might have suddenly changed."

Judge: "Buddha, what happened? You aren't presenting a dish? "

Buddha: "Yes, it is a metaphor for how desire leads to suffering, and we must empty ourselves of desire to achieve a higher state of being."

Buddha: "Also, i lost track of time and burned my souffle. "

Judge: "Wittgenstein? Where to begin... this tastes absolutely disgusting."

Second Judge: "Yeah, i agree, this is disgusting, what is in this?"

Wittgenstein: "Ahh yes, but when each of us say something tastes "disgusting", there is no way to know if we are all experiencing the same sensation."

Wittgenstein: "So while you've both learned to use the word "disgusting" to successfully navigate social situations and participate in language games.."

Wittgenstein:: "...internally you might be feeling different tastes, even pleasant ones, so the dish might be good!"

Judge: "No, i'm pretty sure it's just bad."

]]> Mon, 02 Aug 2021 09:00:00 +0200 https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_5g1Yb9sad59f9M7fKGWt0o <![CDATA[Francis Bacon Invents Science]]> https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_5sdj2CI8yJMZONpYks2fGs

Francis Bacon: "Everyone, hey everyone, listen up. I have this great new idea that will totally revolutionize the world. "

Francis Bacon: "We must dismiss all prejudices and preconceptions and collect facts by observing the natural world."
Person in crowd: "Sounds stupid."
Francis Bacon: "Sounds not stupid!"

Person: "Why don't we just find the truth by thinking about things really hard? "

Francis Bacon: "Because! It's far better to set up theories and then observe the actual world to see if theory matches up with prediction."

Francis Bacon: "But how do you know it's better?"

Francis Bacon thinks about it, then replies angrily: "I thought about it really hard, okay!"

]]> Mon, 26 Jul 2021 09:00:00 +0200 https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_5sdj2CI8yJMZONpYks2fGs <![CDATA[Philosophical Mythbusters]]> https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_5WvNHSlZJjVqbel3Iu4GjH

Adam Savage: Welcome to philosophical mythbusters! What are we testing today Jamie?"

Jamie Hyneman: "Well Adam, we are testing a very common myth, the myth of the given."
Adam: "What is that?"

Jamie: "This is a myth that what objects appear to our minds as they are, without being filtered through our own conceptual capacities."
Adam: "So basically that there is such a thing as raw “sense data?”"
Jamie: "Exactly."

Adam: "And how are we going to test it today?"
Jamie: "By looking at things!"

Adam: "Let's look at this table."
Description: the both look intently at a table.

Adam: "Well it certainly does seem to be there."
Jamie: "Yes but doesn't our concept of the table and structure of our brain affect how it appears?"

Adam: "Probably, but what about just the color red?"
Jamie: "Let's test it out."

Adam, looking at a red square on the wall: "Yeah, hard to doubt that redness is appearing."

Adam: "I guess we are going to have to give this one “plausible”."
Jamie: "Agreed."

Jamie: "Okay, our next myth is the myth of causation. This is the idea that one event causes another, rather than events simply occurring together. "

Adam: "I've set up a pool table and we are going to hit some balls together to see if we see causation in action, or bust this myth."
Jamie: "Sounds great."

Description: they both stare at two balls as they collide on the pool table.

Adam: "Did you see any causation?"
Jamie: "Not exactly, but it still really seemed like one event caused the next."
Adam: "Agreed, we can't really say we busted it, or confirmed it."

Adam: "So i guess we'll have to give this one a “plausible” as well."
Jamie: "Yep, in fact, that's the 58 times in a row we've given “plausible”."

Adam: "Yeah, come to think of it, this concept for a show doesn't really work."
Jamie: "No, not at all. If these questions could be decided empirically they wouldn't be philosophical."

Adam: "Anyway, join us next week, we are going to push a fat guy onto a train track to see if it causes a net moral good."

]]> Mon, 19 Jul 2021 09:00:00 +0200 https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_5WvNHSlZJjVqbel3Iu4GjH <![CDATA[Super Academics]]> https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_7TmQ1_ZvREX5ONpYks2fGs

Description: four academics in spacesuits reading books in a space colony.

Person: "Super academics, hurry, our mining facility on Centauri-12 is being destroyed by an alien species! "

Economic Academic: "Good god, that mining facility is worth billions in economic activity, we have to save it right away!"

Science Academic: "I've done some experiments and determined the aliens are vulnerable to high concentrations of heat."

Engineering Academic: "I've engineered a focused laser weapon based on your research."

Philosophy Academic: "I've determined that we have no moral right to kill the aliens!"

Science Academic: "What?!"

Philosophy Academic: "Well, we are colonizing and invading their home world to enrich ourselves. Actually it seems pretty obvious..."

Economics Academic, as all raise their hands: "Who votes to kick super philosopher out of the group?"

Philosophy Academic: "Would it help if i explained that a majority vote can still violate the intrinsic rights of a minority?"

Engineering Academic: "No. Get out or we will laser cannon your face!"

]]> Mon, 12 Jul 2021 09:00:00 +0200 https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_7TmQ1_ZvREX5ONpYks2fGs <![CDATA[The Philosophers Dating Game]]> https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_5j3NSe3rg8g_9M7fKGWt0o

Host: "Welcome to the philosophers dating game. Simone de Beauvoir will interview our three mystery philosophers and decide which to go on a date with. Let's begin."

Simone de Beauvoir: "Contestant number one, if you could imagine an ideal dream date, what would it be?"

Bertrand Russell: "I would spend the night setting up a formal system of dating that is grounded in pure logic. "

Simone de Beauvoir: "Uh...okay. Contestant number two, what was the best real date you ever had?"

Alexius Meinong: "Well I went on a date with Pamela Anderson and she said she loved my system of ontology."

Simone de Beauvoir: "No, I said real dates."

Alexius Meinong: "Well, imaginary things are real, they are just lacking the property of existence. So in a sense I've been on a hundreds of great dates."

Simone de Beauvoir: "Contestant number three, what do you find to be most beautiful in a woman?"

Rudolf Carnap: "Actually i think you'll find that question to be nonsense because it has no empirically verifiable content."

Alexius Meinong: "Alright, you know what? On second thought i don't want to date a philosopher at all. They are a bunch of weird nerds."
Host: "Yes, that's what most of the contestants say."

]]> Mon, 05 Jul 2021 09:00:00 +0200 https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_5j3NSe3rg8g_9M7fKGWt0o <![CDATA[The Unexamined Life]]> https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_49ykHAKflTm96jHbRcHw3s

Socrates: "The unexamined life is not worth living. "

Student: "What if you don't examine your life, but you were super rich and had sex with all the hottest women?"

Socrates: "Still. Knowledge is true happiness."

Student: "All the hottest dudes?"

Socrates, considering: "Well...."
Socrates: "No, even still, true happiness comes through contemplation. What's better, having sex or understanding beauty itself?"

Student: "Are you kidding? Having sex obviously."

Socrates: "You only think that because you are ignorant!"

Socrates: "For example, last night while you students were out partying and having sex, i was contemplating the pure form of beauty."

Socrates: "And it was PRETTY hot."

]]> Mon, 28 Jun 2021 09:00:00 +0200 https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_49ykHAKflTm96jHbRcHw3s <![CDATA[Dostoyevsky Find Other Employment]]> https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_7PyAPtky0Ch2nhpmeYcemU

Dostoevsky as a Therapist:

Patient: "Since my mother died I've been suffering tremendously."

Dostoevsky: "That's good."
Patient: "Because it's part of the healing process?"

Dostoevsky: "No, because we must endure unspeakable suffering in life to fully understand the human condition!"

Dostoevsky as an Engineer

Dostoevsky: "Yes, this bridge is my masterpiece. It is the ultimate symbol of how science can never answer the question of what gives our life meaning."

Person: "How so?"

Dostoevsky: "Well, when people drive over it, it collapses and they plummet to their deaths, for one."

Dostoevsky as a Doctor:

Patient's relative: "What is the diagnosis, Doctor?"

Dostoevsky: "Brain fever!"

Dostoevsky: "And also equally to blame is a deep existential despair that no matter what we do we can never create a perfect world on earth."

Dostoevsky as a Priest:

Church goer: "Father, i feel like I've been having trouble living a religious life, and i need the church to guide me."

Dostoevsky: "The church?"

Dostoevsky: "The church only gives comforting lies to placate the masses into upholding the status quo."

Dostoevsky: "If you want to live for God you must give up all worldly possessions."

Church goer: "That sounds extreme..."
Dostoevsky: "If God exists then you must sacrifice everything for your eternal life, you fool!"

Dostoevsky as a soccer goalie:

Description, he stands still as someone kicks in a goal.

Dostoevsky, to his teammates: "Yes, i let the goal go in on purpose, and yes i know it only hurts myself, but i did it out of spite! We must rebel against expectations to prove that we are free!"

Dostoevsky as an Office worker:

Human resources person: "Do you know why we've called you in here, Dostoevsky?"
Dostoevsky: "Not really."

Human resources person: "One of your coworkers said you threatened to “murder her so hard with an axe”."

Dostoevsky: "Yes, but in my defense I'm pretty sure I'm a great man of history, like Napoleon, so the corpses i leave in my wake are nothing compared to my ultimate destiny."

Dostoevsky: "Also she drank the last of the coffee and didn't refill it."

]]> Mon, 21 Jun 2021 09:00:00 +0200 https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_7PyAPtky0Ch2nhpmeYcemU <![CDATA[Meditations on Second Philosophy]]> https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_4ZXl3RFxaxa4IAmcWJ0TmB

Descartes: "Meditations on First Philosophy was so popular, i can't believe it. Everyone is reading my work! "

Descartes: "The publisher is really wanting a sequel, though. What else is a revolutionary philosophy? Hmm..."

Descartes: "I know, instead of practicing methodological doubt I'll try methodological belief! I'll practice believing absolutely everything. Starting with the fact that this is a brilliant idea."

Descartes: "I'll believe everything I hear, to see if I can find at least one fact that cannot be believed."

Person 1: "Did you know if you swallow a watermelon seed a watermelon will grow inside of you?"
Descartes: "I believe it."

Person 2: "Did you know alligators live in the sewers because people flushed them down their toilets?"
Descartes: "Seems reasonable to me."
Person 2: "Also the earth is flat."
Descartes: "Why not?"

Person 3: "The best way to help poor people is to give more money to rich people."
Descartes: "I believe th- wait...what? how?"

Person 3: "Because then they'll hire poor people to do work, and the wealth will trickle down."
Descartes: "Are you stupid?"

Person 3: "No, actually it's all based on math. Check out this graph, it explains why the poor deserve to suffer."
Descartes: "Alright, well i found the one thing too stupid to believe."

]]> Mon, 14 Jun 2021 09:00:00 +0200 https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_4ZXl3RFxaxa4IAmcWJ0TmB <![CDATA[Presocratic Staff Meeting]]> https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_6HnppiNIvSZagHTd9OkkKt

PERSON: "Okay everyone, let's get started with the presocartic staff meeting. "

PERSON: "First item on the agenda, we want to move future staff meetings to Tuesdays, any objections?"

PERSON: "Yes, I have an objection."

PERSON: "Ugh...what is it Zeno? and you better not say because motion is im-"

PERSON: "We can't move it to tuesday because motion is impossible!"

PERSON: "Okay, first of all, when i say we are “moving” you understand i'm just talking about meeting on a different day, right?"

PERSON: "No, no thought experiments, remember, we all agreed."

PERSON: "Okay, but imagine a turtle that always changed meeting times..."

PERSON: "And secondly, you can't just object to everything with “motion is impossible”."

PERSON: "Actually, change is impossible, so he will never stop doing that, you might as well accept it."

PERSON: "On a related note, i object to changing the time of the staff meeting because change is impossible."

PERSON: "Yeah, why is this called a “presocratic staff meeting”, what is a presocratic?"

PERSON: "Parmenides...god damnit. Fine, okay, we won't change the meeting time, any other objections?"

]]> Mon, 07 Jun 2021 09:00:00 +0200 https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_6HnppiNIvSZagHTd9OkkKt <![CDATA[A Day in the Life of Arthur Schopenhauer]]> https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_43rKhNMgQ8cIIAmcWJ0TmB

Description: Schopenhauer waking up in the morning.
Schopenhauer: "God dammit I'm still alive! "

Next scene: Schopenhauer hears cracking of whips outside to drive horse carts.
Schopenhauer: "Hey, shut the hell up! I'm trying to explain how stupid Hegel is!"

Next scene: Schopenhauer talking to a woman.
Woman: "Uh, actually i already have a boyfriend."
Woman: "Anyway uh...I've gotta go."
Schopenhauer: "Yeah, well, women are all stupid children anyway and i don't even want a girlfriend! "

Next scene: Schopenhauer with his poodle.
Schopenhauer: "Alright, time for a music break, Atma."
Description: he plays the flute for his poodle and they dance together.

Next scene: Schopenhauer at dinner.
Schopenhauer's mom: "I made you some sandwiches."
Schopenhauer: "Mother, how many times have i told you? You have to cut the crusts off, i don't like crusts!"

Next scene: Schopenhauer going to bed.
Schopenhauer: "Well, time for bed."
Schopenhauer: "God dammit, I lived through the entire day. "

]]> Mon, 31 May 2021 09:00:00 +0200 https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_43rKhNMgQ8cIIAmcWJ0TmB <![CDATA[Socrates Through Time]]> https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_6DL83rPj-rcgC0qH-r7xlT

Socrates: "Everyone in Athens is stupid. I'm traveling to the future when people will have learned more so i can have someone smart to talk to for once."

Description: Socrates enters a phone booth and time travels to the future.

Socrates: "Ah, the future! Through the dialectic process of philosophy, they all should have become so wise and understand the truth!"

Socrates, the year 1300: "Burning heathens? This is stupid as hell. Why haven't people gotten any smarter?"

Socrates, the year 1932: "Mr. Hitler, your ideas are dumb as shit, have you considered that?"

Socrates, the year 1970: "This is what they are calling philosophy!?"

Socrates, present day on a computer: "Great, finally! An Agora the size of the Earth, where the best ideas can flourish."

Person: "And this is what's called a “comment section”, it allows an open dialogue across the earth."

Description: Socrates stares at the computer in shock and disbelief.

Socrates: "Do you happen to have any hemlock on you?"

]]> Mon, 24 May 2021 09:00:00 +0200 https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_6DL83rPj-rcgC0qH-r7xlT <![CDATA[Kierkegaard Goes to Therapy]]> https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_7KLIU0BUDpPgaB2UxGNFpJ

Therapist: "Welcome, Kierkegaard. What made you decide to get therapy? "

Kierkegaard: "Because one day i am going to die."

Kierkegaard: "Every moment i am aware of this fact, and belief in a life after death cannot come from reason. Every moment i live i am thrust into despair at having to choose what to do with my brief life, but ultimately knowing that only the void awaits and all my choices are meaningless in the end. This can only be overcome through faith in the eternal, but a new stronger despair haunts us then: we are always aware that faith is irrational, and we can never eradicate the gnawing doubt that we might waste our one life worshiping a God who doesn't exist."

Kierkegaard: "Don't you see? The very structure of existence itself is despair, and we cannot escape it."

Description: there is a long pause.

Therapist: "Have you tried regular exercise?"

]]> Mon, 17 May 2021 09:00:00 +0200 https://api.follow.it/track-rss-story-click/v3/KXziYKIva_7KLIU0BUDpPgaB2UxGNFpJ