“From Division to Agency: How ‘Let Them’ Can Restore Hope in Civic Life”

By Wallace Rushing
Drawing on Mel Robbins’ The Let Them Theory

American civic life is under stress. From rising partisanship to disinformation to a sense of helplessness among citizens, many feel locked out of meaningful action. But what if the way out begins with reclaiming agency—not over others, but over ourselves? This is the transformative promise of Mel Robbins’ work: shift from resentment and exerting control to clarity and constructive action. People.com+1

The Frustration of Trying to Fix Others

Many of us fall into the trap of investing energy in changing someone else’s mind, winning arguments on social media, or policing others’ behaviours. Robbins argues this often backfires: “When you waste energy trying to control what you can’t, you lose power.” Oprah
In a political context, this may look like: being consumed by how “the other side” behaves, endlessly trying to expose hypocrisy, or waiting for someone else to fix the system.

The Power of Redirecting Focus

Instead, say Robbins: use “Let Them” to release that obsessive energy, and “Let Me” to redirect it.
How does that apply in civic life?

“Let Them” keep shouting, manipulating media narratives, resisting compromise.
“Let Me” choose to participate: volunteer in civic programs, run for local office, start a community dialogue group.
“Let Me” cultivate personal clarity and values: what matters to me? What kind of civic culture do I want to model?

A Today’s Example: Civic Discourse & Misinformation

With concerns about misinformation and media fragmentation, the default reaction is anger: “Why are they sharing that false meme? Why aren’t they listening to facts?”
Robbins’ approach suggests a two-step pivot:

Let Them share what they will—even if uncomfortable. Accept you cannot directly force comprehension.
Let Me invest in building media literacy in your circle, hosting respectful fact-based conversations, designing a local “news buddy” group to examine claims together.

This shifts the narrative from being overwhelmed by the “other side” to proactive local action.

Civil Unity in Polarized Times

In a year where national politics seems grid-locked, one of the most powerful arenas is local engagement: school boards, community centers, housing policy, environmental initiatives. Here’s how “Let Them / Let Me” can restore hope:

Let Them lobby, protest, campaign at the national level.
Let Me attend the town-hall meeting on climate resilience in Ashburn, Virginia.
Let Me sign up as a poll-worker for the next midterm.
Let Me sponsor a civic literacy workshop in my neighborhood.

By acting where we can, we walk out of helplessness and into agency.

Conclusion

Politics isn’t only about winning debates—it’s about wise, consistent participation. As Mel Robbins encourages, the power isn’t in controlling others—it’s in controlling your self.
When you step into the “Let Me” side of the theory, you begin to rebuild civic life—one decision, one neighbor, one community at a time.
In these turbulent times, maybe the most revolutionary thing you can do is simply this: Let Them. Then turn and ask: What will I do?

Author Wallace Rushing

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