The Poke

Donald Trump pronounced Thailand as ‘Thigh-land’– 9 punniest responses

Fri, 07 Aug 2020 09:01:20 GMT

Donald Trump’s got a bit of history when it comes to saying words out loud. In the sense that he doesn’t always manage to get the pronunciation entirely quite right.

And this one was a classic of its type. The autocue said ‘Thailand’ and, well, have a watch for yourself.

Here it is in all its glory:pic.twitter.com/PgTRnHpAA8

— The Recount (@therecount) August 6, 2020

Close, but no cigar, Mr President! And here are our favourite things people said about it.

Thighland is my favorite country after Assganistan. https://t.co/6shV0lkltA

— Alexis Boucher (@alexis_b82) August 6, 2020

thighland and hondurass are nice but I’m more into titaly

— kilgore trout, new tone haver (@KT_So_It_Goes) August 6, 2020

After hearing Donald Trump incorrectly pronounce Thailand as 'Thighland' I hope for his sake 'Scunthorpe' never crops up on his autocue.

— ???????????????????????? (@pearlylondon) August 7, 2020

Thighland is just off the coast of Crotchatia.

— (((Josh Malina))) (@JoshMalina) August 6, 2020

A little afternoon trivia: The chief executive of Thighland is the Lord of the Thighs, not the prime minister. https://t.co/OW9iyfOqDx

— Dave Weigel (@daveweigel) August 6, 2020

Welcome to Thighland pic.twitter.com/7q5fWRCp8i

— Acyn Torabi (@Acyn) August 6, 2020

Many Irish people not wanting to agree with Trump on anything but also thinking "Wait – is it NOT pronounced Thighland?"

— Aisling Bea (@WeeMissBea) August 7, 2020

Thighland is located next to lapland.

— TechnicallyRon (@TechnicallyRon) August 6, 2020

The world according to the Cheeto in Chief. #Thighland pic.twitter.com/0ofBsyMoN6

— IBBabe (@IB_sane) August 7, 2020

“Mr President, I believe Thighland is near Uranus.”

— Faith Salie (@Faith_Salie) August 7, 2020

It’s not the first time Donald Trump’s had trouble with his pronunciations this week (he also struggled with Yosemite).

President Trump cannot pronounce 'Yosemite' pic.twitter.com/RfJrp76taQ

— NowThis (@nowthisnews) August 7, 2020

Yo Semites, let's go on vacation to Thighland https://t.co/FvkJoGrBMi

— Catherine Rampell (@crampell) August 6, 2020

The Prince of Whales and I stopped by Nambia after we left Thighland on our way to Yo-Semite National Park.

We caught a connecting flight out of the Revolutionary War Airport.

— BrooklynDad_Defiant! (@mmpadellan) August 6, 2020

Joe Biden knows how to pronounce Thailand.
and Yosemite.
just saying

— Jeff Tiedrich (@itsJeffTiedrich) August 6, 2020

To conclude …

Thighland pic.twitter.com/pLOGsMUGKG

— Toby Earle (@TobyonTV) August 7, 2020

Source @therecount

The post Donald Trump pronounced Thailand as ‘Thigh-land’ – 9 punniest responses appeared first on The Poke.

Top 10 funny takes on the coronavirus crisis

Fri, 07 Aug 2020 08:54:38 GMT

Welcome to 2020. You now get to go into shops wearing a mask and nobody presses the panic button or hits you with a baseball bat.

Masks, hand sanitiser and eating out are all included in today’s round-up of Twitter’s best takes on the coronavirus.

Everyone's complaining about wearing masks but for centuries everyone had to wear hats in public and there wasn't even a reason, it was just if you showed your head you were an asshole

— Sandra Newman (@sannewman) August 6, 2020

I wonder will foam parties come back but replaced with hand sanitiser?

— Aisling Bea (@WeeMissBea) July 31, 2020

Remember when the Tories endlessly praised a 100-year-old for dragging himself around a garden to raise £32million and then spent £150million buying 50 million unusable masks from an offshore banker with no history of supplying medical equipment

— James Felton (@JimMFelton) August 6, 2020

if anything I'd say the rules on the new localised lockdown are a bit too clear, next time Matt Hancock should slip the announcement in five chocolate bars across different newsagents in the town he wants to lock up

— Marie Le Conte (@youngvulgarian) July 30, 2020

Percentage of emails during coronavirus hoping to find people well: 96%

Percentage of emails during coronavirus that actually found people well: 0%

— Pundamentalism (@Pundamentalism) August 4, 2020

Do you reckon Micky Flanagan’s eating out out to help out out send tweet end career

— Glenn Moore (@TheNewsAtGlenn) August 6, 2020

Im not against masks but golly I miss seeing people’s teeth

— Hoppers (@FrogAvalanche) August 4, 2020

i kno you dont want kids to miss a year of school cause they’ll fall behind but we never missed a year and my classmates still grew up to fall for pyramid schemes

— Dani Fernandez (@msdanifernandez) August 5, 2020

Coronavirus vs track and trace pic.twitter.com/kdg03NneJJ

— •• (@agirlcalledlina) August 6, 2020

10.

trump dealing with covid pic.twitter.com/EGlGAtRgvZ

— kim. (@KimmyMonte) August 7, 2020

Image Screengrab

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This cat kicking itself in the face is a metaphor for everything and a hugely funny watch

Fri, 07 Aug 2020 08:10:36 GMT

This gorgeous ginger tom just can’t get the right angle to scratch his ear and ends up kicking himself in the face – repeatedly.

It’s not big, it’s not clever, but it is very, very funny.

he doesn't realize he can't scratch his ear while lying down pic.twitter.com/lR17ph2VM3

— ياسمين (@minoovo) July 26, 2020

If that hasn’t given your day a lift, there’s not much we can do for you.

These people really appreciated it.

NOOOOO OH MY GOD IM LAUGHING CATS ARE SO STUPID LMAOOOOO

— ᵇˡᵐ★ ✿ (@vaporvvaves) July 27, 2020

Not the smartest kitty in the litter https://t.co/QwrKikvPGV

— James Doleman (@jamesdoleman) August 1, 2020

This literally made me cry laughing – which my emojis say I’m doing a lot, but in this case it was happening for real https://t.co/U45Z1iBNWk

— Bradley on the *Solitary* Run (@bjcjapan) August 4, 2020

This is definitely one of the best cat videos of all time. https://t.co/DfdFhEh6Q1

— N ️‍ (@BornABomber) August 3, 2020

Dying of laughter. Poor kitty.

— Moechi⁷ (@xMoechi) July 27, 2020

Inevitably …

How's 2020 going: https://t.co/NxUcWLmmeS

— Katie-Mai Quinn (@katiemaikong) August 5, 2020

from Agree GIFs via Gfycat

Source @minoovo Image @minoovo

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Bride asks people to write 500 word ‘application essays’ to come to her wedding and the ...

Fri, 07 Aug 2020 07:48:56 GMT

It can be a tricky business drawing up a list of exactly who you should invite to your wedding. But this, well, this surely isn’t the answer.

It’s a bride who decided to ask guests – or, more accurately, potential guests – to write 500 word ‘application essays’ explaining why they should come before deciding on a final list.

She even asked her sister – her sister! – who did the right thing by telling everyone about it on Reddit’s ‘Am I The Asshole’ subreddit. It’s quite the read.

And the entire internet spoke as one, thank goodness (NTA is ‘not the asshole’ just in case you’re wondering.

‘NTA. I would definitely send in two essays. The first would say “Mom/Dad said I have to come or I’m in BIG trouble” over and over again until you hit 250. The second, “I’m your sibling.”’ sc1293

‘NTA – Holy hell this is a new one, props to your sister for inventing a whole new way to be a lunatic.
If they don’t care enough to “reserve” you a spot, why would you want to celebrate a day with someone so selfish? I think they’re going to get a hard dose of reality when people don’t respond or meet their 500 word essay.

‘How’re you going to be in big trouble with your parents? Assuming you’re old enough to pay for the trip out of your pocket, there’s not really anything they can do except be mad.
Save your money and treat yourself to a nice trip to somewhere that doesn’t have crazy people.’ prinkly

‘I want to come to your wedding very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very much.’ jeffsang

Source Reddit u/Flodomofo

Image Pixabay

The post Bride asks people to write 500 word ‘application essays’ to come to her wedding and the internet spoke as one appeared first on The Poke.

Nigel Farage as Britney Spears is the video we didn’t ask for but can’t stop watching (NSFW)

Fri, 07 Aug 2020 07:22:21 GMT

Comedian Joe Heenan has given us the video we would never have asked for but can’t stop watching, and we’re not sure whether to laugh or cry.

There's an app you can add your face to film or pop stars & I added Farage's to Britney Spears & it's the worst thing ever.
I'm so sorry pic.twitter.com/dI6C5SDmsR

— joe heenan (@joeheenan) August 6, 2020

from Leave Me Alone GIFs via Gfycat

This is how twitter reacted to the ~~monstrosity~~ video.

This is a hate crime. https://t.co/iZaJRHQOu0

— Max (@SpillerOfTea) August 6, 2020

I will never ever be able to unsee this.

Now nor will you. https://t.co/HdjaWqSxgU

— paul (@stimmopaul1) August 6, 2020

That's a challenging wank… https://t.co/yvOUJtAZYe

— Andy Lulham (@LulhAndy) August 7, 2020

OMG!
What have I just seen! https://t.co/u7IXumFtuZ

— Soopagaz #BuckForis (@soopagaz) August 6, 2020

l’m laughing until he’s in the gauzy bodysuit when I begin to vomit https://t.co/uougN9hiTM

— plain old Willow (@riverthistle) August 6, 2020

It’s clear that Joe has opened Pandora’s Box, because this happened.

Cheers Joe, just found the app…here’s Shakira Rees Mogg pic.twitter.com/35tZXe43Wv

— Kenny Downes (@downes_kenny) August 6, 2020

We’ll just leave this here.

Source Joe Heenan Image Joe Heenan

The post Nigel Farage as Britney Spears is the video we didn’t ask for but can’t stop watching (NSFW) appeared first on The Poke.

Donald Trump’s car crash interview makes more sense when he’s replaced with ‘Liza Minnelli’

Fri, 07 Aug 2020 06:45:44 GMT

The absolutely brilliant Sooz Kempner has given us the weirdest version yet of Donald Trump‘s disastrous – from his point of view – interview with Jonathan Swan.

Step aside, Sooz – here comes Liza Minnelli.

She shared a slightly shorter version on Twitter, where people quite rightly loved it.

Sooz does the exact script of Trump's interview but as Liza Minelli and it is very funny. @SoozUK https://t.co/SFV6zsYy5f

— Aisling Bea (@WeeMissBea) August 5, 2020

This is my brilliant friend Sooz. Like @RandyRainbow, she's been getting me through these trying months with laughter & catharsis. And she's the only person who could get me to listen to this painfully hilarious dialogue again.
Please watch & enjoy! https://t.co/XNOkXgLUJr

— Christina Bianco (@XtinaBianco1) August 5, 2020

Oh my gosh, I love you Sooz x

— Bethany Black (@BeffernieBlack) August 5, 2020

I never knew I needed this but GOD I NEEDED THIS.

— Rosie Holt (@RosieisaHolt) August 4, 2020

It says a lot about Trump that this comment from Luke feels right.

It sounds much less unhinged coming from Liza. That's a worry.

— Luke (@cubluke) August 5, 2020

That’s ‘Donald’ with a D, not ‘Ronald’ with an R, ’cause Ronald with an R is a clown. Oh!

Source Sooz Kempner Image Sooz Kempner

The post Donald Trump’s car crash interview makes more sense when he’s replaced with ‘Liza Minnelli’ appeared first on The Poke.

An anti-masker left his server a petty message and a terrible tip

Fri, 07 Aug 2020 06:02:57 GMT

A waitress has shared a photo of the message left for her by an anti-mask customer, along with his incredibly low tip. Ali Siverhus posted this on her social media accounts.

Ali explained that she was wearing a mask when she took the man’s order, in accordance with city mandates in Lincoln, Nebraska, where she works.

Customers aren’t even required to wear masks, so she was baffled by his attitude.

“How is me wearing a mask affecting this man?“

She added this message for the guy who left the note:

“I hope your son didn’t see you do this and doesn’t turn into the piece of shit you are.”

“I hope you never come back and if you do none of the servers will want to serve you or waste their time giving you anything beyond adequate service.”

A man claiming to be the customer, Rex Shroeder, contacted a news outlet to insist he had added $10 in cash, although restaurant security footage shows that he didn’t – and Shroeder may not even be the man involved.

Here are a few things Twitter users said about the anti-masker’s behaviour.

I would hope the restaurant owner or manager reached out to this customer and invited them to never eat at their restaurant ever again.

— OmaJen (@elmax21) August 5, 2020

“Get rid of masks, tips will be bigger,” says the angry redneck complaining about the economy struggling, as he/she underpays an essential worker.

— Matt Dula (@MattDula17) August 6, 2020

Here is a Tip: You don't punish the server for bad food or restaurant policy. You tip based on the performance of the server.

— Dick Roosa (@deanross45) August 4, 2020

Someone named Gene may have hit the nail on the head.

Trust me when the masks come off he'll still be cheap!

— Gene (@GeneT1955) August 5, 2020

Source Daily Dot Image Daily Dot, @bimoluki02 on Unsplash

The post An anti-masker left his server a petty message and a terrible tip appeared first on The Poke.

The only 5 brutal responses you need to Nigel Farage complaining about refugees visiting Anfield

Fri, 07 Aug 2020 05:08:29 GMT

Remember when Nigel Farage campaigned on the back of not being a career politician despite having been a politician for actual decades?

Well, it’s fair to say he has a different job now, and that’s making Partridgesque videos about refugees – or “illegal migrants”, as the seven-time general election loser calls them.

Just hours after being ridiculed for his footage of an “invasion” on the Kent coast, he shared this clip of himself complaining about *checks notes* a charity day out to Anfield Stadium for refugees.

First it was a taxi service into Dover.

Then it was free coaches and Four Star Hotels.

Now it’s guided tours of Anfield Stadium for illegal migrants.

When will this madness end? pic.twitter.com/OR0pHya9z2

— Nigel Farage (@Nigel_Farage) August 6, 2020

The takedowns were about as savage as we’ve seen, and these five show the strength of feeling.

Refugees are welcome at Anfield. You’re not. You scrotom-faced gobshite. https://t.co/9su9ccPphM

— Adam Rowe (@adamrowecomedy) August 6, 2020

This arsehole fucked off to America to sit in a car park, during a global pandemic. He said he was broke whilst freeloading off Aaron Banks. He formed a pact with a holocaust denier to keep leeching EU funds. He set up a PLC and robbed his donors.

Hypocritical twat. https://t.co/EnUfzVuAis

— Skew Spew Barmy Hairdo Cut-throat Bigot And Smug (@SkewSpew) August 6, 2020

Why can't we deport #NigelFarage? https://t.co/hr6riG79Ye

— Derek James (@derekjames150) August 6, 2020

Can we start a fund to pay for every asylum seeker a free trip to Thorpe Park, just to wind this frog-faced septic nazi into a heart attack? https://t.co/jTShT9f1MV

— Enough Of That Now (@AndyGilder) August 6, 2020

Hark the disordered and diseased bigoted mind of the incorrigible Little Englander. From Trump's gold elevator to a rowing boat and camera phone in the English Channel.

Farage should come stamped with a public health warning. https://t.co/q6TcsS5l7K

— John Wight (@JohnWight1) August 6, 2020

One person added insult to injury.

Your statue for services to the UK is nearly ready pic.twitter.com/fKy5T3vfJb

— lookeyhere (@lookeyhere4) August 6, 2020

From most of the responses, it’s clear that refugees are afforded a warm welcome to Liverpool – unlike racists.

The people of Liverpool pushing EDL back to the train station whilst the Benny Hill theme tune plays on a PA.

video by David Wood pic.twitter.com/CVoPAneBm3

— IndependentLiverpool (@IndpndtLiv) June 3, 2017

Source Nigel Farage Image Nigel Farage

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Nigel Farage posted a video of ‘migrants’ landing in Kent – only 5 responses you need

Thu, 06 Aug 2020 15:49:51 GMT

Nigel Farage appears to have been hanging around beaches again after he posted ‘exclusive footage’ of a ‘shocking invasion’ on the Kent coast.

EXCLUSIVE FOOTAGE OF BEACH LANDING BY MIGRANTS

Shocking invasion on the Kent Coast taken this morning. pic.twitter.com/iuzAF0Uxz4

— Nigel Farage (@Nigel_Farage) August 6, 2020

And these really are the only 5 responses you need.

“Invasion”. It’s a fucking dinghy filled with kids. I think we’ll cope.

— James Felton (@JimMFelton) August 6, 2020

I'm not sure how Nigel Farage can insist Britain is a global force which can stand alone in the world if he think it's vulnerable to invasion by a few kids in a dingy. https://t.co/5RTdSv6DTe

— Graham Lithgow (@grahamlithgow) August 6, 2020

“Peg it lads, here comes Nigel bloody Farage again.” pic.twitter.com/woRJQNsJ3m

— Michael Moran (@TheMichaelMoran) August 6, 2020

Look out Nigel – you missed this invasion. pic.twitter.com/p7YxXVrnYm

— Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) August 6, 2020

I’ve fixed that for you. You’re welcome. pic.twitter.com/gnORkBl0QF

— Nick Harvey (@mrnickharvey) August 6, 2020

To conclude …

Racist bags of shit:
We are a mighty war-winning nation that can cope with anything

Also racist bags of shit:
HELP THESE 5 ADULTS AND 3 KIDS ARE INVADING IN A DINGHY https://t.co/HFKjP5lCWX

— James Felton (@JimMFelton) August 6, 2020

Source @Nigel_Farage

The post Nigel Farage posted a video of ‘migrants’ landing in Kent – only 5 responses you need appeared first on The Poke.

This is why full stops are important

Thu, 06 Aug 2020 14:01:56 GMT

‘You can’t put a price on full stops,’ says John Featherstone – @johnfeath – over on Twitter.

At least, we’re presuming that’s not what they intended to say.

Nothing wrong with the punctuation on this one, though.

Source @johnfeath

The post This is why full stops are important appeared first on The Poke.

This guy’s incredible gun impressions will have you ducking for cover

Thu, 06 Aug 2020 13:10:42 GMT

This guy’s gun impressions are good – really good. And if you’re of a certain age they will instantly remind you of the Police Academy movies.

@highground413

Haven’t done one of these in a while ##fyp ##impressions ##soundfx ##noises ##cod ##modernwarfare ##lmg ##machinegun

♬ original sound – highground413

Just in case you were wondering …

‘M240 machine gun
Generic 5.56 (M4) from a distance
Side-arm… 9mm. Either a M9 or M17
M249 light-machine gun
M242 Bushmaster
FGM-148 Javelin…. something tube launched with a kicker engine
Something very large bore, not sure
M2 50 cal
M134 mini-gun
Edit: These are educated guesses based on my time with ISAF.’ Ninnux

Oh, and this.

‘If you watch it without the sound it looks like he’s taking a really strange shit.’ QuantumButtFuckery

This is similar but different, very different.

Source TikTok Mr. Onomatopoeia H/T Reddit u/ohmickel Image Unsplash

The post This guy’s incredible gun impressions will have you ducking for cover appeared first on The Poke.

Bad day? Could be worse, you could have just accidentally eaten the world’s hottest chilli pepper

Thu, 06 Aug 2020 12:42:17 GMT

In the latest of an occasional series, ‘If you’re having a bad day, it could be worse …’ comes this clip of a man accidentally – well, not entirely accidentally – eating the world’s hottest chilli pepper.

It’s a slow burn, if you see what we mean.

‘Guy accidentally eat the world’s hottest chilli pepper that lasts 6 hours in your mouth,’ said Tutrois who posted it over on Reddit.

Old but gold.

‘A million Scoville heat units.’

‘What does that mean?’

He was about to find out.

“That was a dumb move wasn’t it?” One of the best realization lines I’ve heard.’ GreenLemon7378

‘Wait did he really take a second bite after the first???’ wolfshirtx

‘And then he touches his fucking eye!’ KaiTheSushiGuy

‘I loved that last bit. He messed up big time, but he’s taking it like a champ.’ murphinski

Source YouTube H/T Reddit u/Tutrois

The post Bad day? Could be worse, you could have just accidentally eaten the world’s hottest chilli pepper appeared first on The Poke.

Dad joke of the week

Thu, 06 Aug 2020 12:19:57 GMT

‘Perks of living on a golf course,’ said froDoReMi over on Reddit.

So great! Every time someone hits a golf ball into this guy’s yard, he goes and lays next to it until they arrive. : @thesheyshey pic.twitter.com/OnQnQtu0QK

— Trevor Noah (@Trevornoah) July 30, 2020

The video was originally posted by @thesheyshey and went viral after it was shared on Twitter and Reddit. Here are just a few of the comments it prompted.

‘As someone who’s hit golf balls into a backyard or two, this was gut wrenching to watch. I bet this keeps him up at night.’ we_ball

‘At least the golfer looked legitimately concerned. Dad has a good sense of humour.’ 50at20

‘I used to live backed up to a course. My dad would just start stealing the balls and acting dumb when the people would come looking for them. He had hundreds by the time we moved out.’ kaitykat19

H/T Reddit u/froDoReMi Twitter @Trevornoah Source @thesheyshey

The post Dad joke of the week appeared first on The Poke.

This cat taking an unexpected trip on a hang glider is an amazing watch

Thu, 06 Aug 2020 10:11:43 GMT

If you’ve seen this before then it definitely merits repeated viewing. But if you haven’t, then you’re in for a treat.

‘Remove cat before flight,’ said romain jantot who posted it on YouTube.

We like the guy’s double take when he spots the cat, almost as much as the amount of time it takes his passenger to realise what’s was going on.

However many lives that cat had left, it now has one fewer.

Source YouTube

The post This cat taking an unexpected trip on a hang glider is an amazing watch appeared first on The Poke.

Our 14 favourite jokes about how the coronavirus crisis is going

Thu, 06 Aug 2020 10:09:07 GMT

The Chancellor’s Eat Out to Help Out discount scheme seems to be working well, as some people have been boasting of buying double their usual food and going into numerous restaurants on several days.

Boris Johnson’s weight-loss campaign …not so good.

People have been tweeting about Rishi Two-Snacks’ scheme and a lot more besides.

Bit of confusion in Lancashire as many people think the message is "EAT OWT TO HELP OUT" https://t.co/Zq564dKADG

— Shaun Keaveny (@shaunwkeaveny) August 5, 2020

I know Tom Hanks has had a tough quarantine, but on the upside he’s probably not had to spend as much time with Chet Hanks.

— Bethany Black (@BeffernieBlack) August 5, 2020

americans are actually just going to go extinct. pic.twitter.com/Lnkw0FSCBV

— ً (@maivinyl) July 28, 2020

Ironic how the same people worried the govt will use the Covid vaccine to track us are also the only people who “check in” to places on FB.

It’s like, really Linda? You went to Jiffy Lube & Applebee’s yesterday. We don’t care, the CIA doesn’t care, NO ONE CARES.

— Crystal Lowery Comedian (@Crystalllowery) July 25, 2020

I took my face mask off and there was a dead spider inside it, so I'm quite confident my current levels of horror are higher than yours.

— Caitlin Moran (@caitlinmoran) August 4, 2020

I just got kicked out of a flat earth Facebook group because I asked if the 6 foot social distancing guideline had pushed anyone over the edge yet.

— Kevin Shanks (@forensictoxguy) August 2, 2020

As scientists begin testing raw sewage for signs of Covid-19, experts suggest applying the same process to government briefings.

— Have I Got News For You (@haveigotnews) August 4, 2020

The post Our 14 favourite jokes about how the coronavirus crisis is going appeared first on The Poke.

The ‘best-selling toy this summer’ is the most relatable thing we’ve seen today

Thu, 06 Aug 2020 09:23:20 GMT

This one goes out to parents who’ve been homeworking (and occasionally homeschooling) for the last, ooh, 5 months or so.

‘Best-selling toy this summer,’ said cuchicou over on Reddit.

‘You forgot child aged 9 barging in on every single video call trying to say hello to your associates.’ ZombiJesus

‘Cat walking on keyboard sold separately.’ brown-spot

‘Never in all my childless years have I been more happy to be childless.’ toodlesandpoodles

Source Reddit u/cuchicou

The post The ‘best-selling toy this summer’ is the most relatable thing we’ve seen today appeared first on The Poke.

The ‘accidentally left-wing’ Twitter account shows how right-wing comments can backfire – ...

Thu, 06 Aug 2020 09:22:13 GMT

For people who insist that they’re shadow banned or cancelled by the woke, right-wing commentators and social media users certainly seem to say a lot of stuff online.

The accidentally left-wing Twitter account curates great examples of comments made by these people that accidentally promote Socialism.

These are our 10 favourites.

1. Balking at the prevention of starvation and homelessness

sure pic.twitter.com/NvLgzCg5dw

— accidentally left-wing (@accidental_left) August 2, 2020

2. Black Lives Matter

Via

3. Horrible bosses

yes pic.twitter.com/KhcvN3M3tg

— accidentally left-wing (@accidental_left) August 4, 2020

4. This game of Spot the Racism is a bit too easy

yes pic.twitter.com/0c84Uhobll

— accidentally left-wing (@accidental_left) August 5, 2020

5. Geography fail

Via

6. The gun lobby’s accidental realism

pic.twitter.com/SkHUxu8wH7

— accidentally left-wing (@accidental_left) August 5, 2020

7. Feminism

pretty much pic.twitter.com/aRkbnoLyqm

— accidentally left-wing (@accidental_left) July 30, 2020

8. Empire building

yes pic.twitter.com/PzqjZuRWZQ

— accidentally left-wing (@accidental_left) August 4, 2020

9. When you think you have an argument against benefits but it’s really an argument for a fair wage

mine too pic.twitter.com/klK3Sx80H6

— accidentally left-wing (@accidental_left) July 31, 2020

10. Not even Trump himself is immune.

pic.twitter.com/uHC1iIDIEX

— accidentally left-wing (@accidental_left) August 4, 2020

Bonus: Just following orders.

when you accidentally admit you're exactly like Nazis pic.twitter.com/dyV0ZPPveY

— accidentally left-wing (@accidental_left) July 30, 2020

Source @accidental_left Image @jmuniz on Unsplash

The post The ‘accidentally left-wing’ Twitter account shows how right-wing comments can backfire – a top 10 appeared first on The Poke.

What a thoughtful Shrek-themed birthday party – oh!

Thu, 06 Aug 2020 08:04:37 GMT

TikTok user @babyray went to a lot of trouble to make their brother-in-law’s Shrek-themed birthday party very special, with swampy green decor and insect-decorated buffet, green balloons and napkins. Even green food.

There was only one problem.

@_babyray

##shrekisloveshrekislife ##fyp

♬ I’m on My Way – The Proclaimers

When KKKLLLNNN shared the video to the r/Unexpected subReddit, someone said

“It’s a follow up to last year’s Kermit The Frog themed party.”

Next year, the Hulk.

Source @_babyray Image @_babyray

The post What a thoughtful Shrek-themed birthday party – oh! appeared first on The Poke.

This dad’s spoof tribute to his son is brutal and very funny

Thu, 06 Aug 2020 08:00:56 GMT

Over on Reddit JestarAuthor has shared the spoof tribute piece his dad wrote about him and it’s brutal and very funny.

‘Throwback to when my mom forgot to submit my senior baby ad for the yearbook and asked my dad to do it,’ said JestarAuthor.

And it’s fair to say his dad saw an opportunity and he went for it. He really went for it.

Ooof.

‘This is the kind of parent I aspire to be.’ glormimanutd

‘Dang your dad is SAVAGE.’ cubonefan3

‘Sarcasm was spoken like a second language in our house.’ JestarAuthor

And just in case anyone was worried it was a little bit too much, here’s what the son had to say.

‘A couple people are asking “how could he write that about his kid.” I would like to say: He asked me before he submitted this. Of course I said yes. My father loves me very much, and has always been someone I look up to. His sense of humor has shaped my own, and this is something we still look at at laugh. Just jokes folks.’ JestarAuthor

‘That sunglasses pic though.’ ladyreyreigns

‘Absolutely had to be the biggest one on the page’. JestarAuthor

Source Reddit u/JestarAuthor

The post This dad’s spoof tribute to his son is brutal and very funny appeared first on The Poke.

5G conspiracy theorist of the day

Thu, 06 Aug 2020 07:37:22 GMT

In the latest of a (very) occasional series, 5G conspiracy theorist of the day is …

Presumably it’s a joke – let’s hope so, for everyone’s sake – but it still made us smile.

‘Imagine you walk by a cell phone tower and a wave of force slams you against the nearest wall.’ jbeldham

‘Well, that explains it. If I want to download something really quickly I need to borrow a jet and really pull those Gs.’ meatbag2010

‘I have a 5g phone that I’ve weaponised. It’s nowhere near as powerful as a tower, but when someone pisses me off, I whip it out and hold it up to them. It’s like I’m punching them, but nobody sees me making physical contact, so the police can do nothing.’ _breadpool_

Source Reddit u/YoThisTK

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